WHILE MY CYST GENTLY WEEPS

I drove Dana to the brink of insanity singing that line incessantly throughout the second half of our holiday, but I felt I had good reason to. After enduring several days of discomfort, I finally decided to take my cyst to the doctors. Simultaneously inviting Dana to "watch something gross", Dr Lee proceeded to squeeze out all the gunk that had built up. According to Dana, it was like a thin tube of yellow puss. Nice.

The fluid kept building back up, and Dana kindly took over squeezing duties, but the lack of any constant lump rubbing against my collar and a second prescription of antibiotics seemed to do the trick, thus making the latter part of my holiday that much more enjoyable.

Leaving Chicago behind, we made our way up to Canada to visit Dana's brother in Toronto, taking the odd detour in the process. The three day trip was assisted by AQA whose wisdom (or, more accurately, access to Google) directed us to the Indiana Dunes, National Lakeshore and Cuyahoga Vallery, all of which we duly visited.

AQA certainly have their uses, but can sometimes miss the mark. I asked then why Dana was sulking one morning and the response was as follows: "Dana was sulking this morning when you left the hotel because you forgot to tell her how beautiful she looked. She wants you to give her more attention." So, in response, I offered my hand and complimented Dana's beauty, to which she replied, "Fuck off". I would have been impressed if AQA had answered "painters are in", but they can't get it right all of the time.