BED-RIDDEN BEAGLE

Unfortunately, the $5 Challenge has been forced into a three-day hiatus, predominantly due to a bout of food poisoning. Virus, stomach flu, voodoo from someone I outdrew, whatever it is, it’s been pretty nasty.

I was periodically sick as soon as I woke up on Wednesday, rushing to the loo every 20-30 minutes. This lasted until around midnight, so by that time I’d hurled around 20 times – nice! My insides were hurting, my joints were aching, I had no energy whatsoever and couldn’t seem to get rid of the vile taste in my mouth caused by the upheaval of bile. Furthermore, no action with the Mrs!

It’s now 5am on Friday morning, and, thankfully, I’m feeling much better. I managed to consume my first meal in two days (well, prodded at a Shepherd’s Pie), and all those aches and pains seem to be gradually fading away, so I’m pretty sure I’m on the mend.

Wednesday was one of the worst days I’ve endured for quite a while and, surprisingly, it wasn’t induced by alcohol or doing my bollox at poker, although I do recall saying “Never Again!” before realising that I hadn’t been out on the razz the night before.

What was most worrying, however, was that I was potentially going to miss out on my appearance on the Sky Poker Open this coming Saturday. It’s still not a definite, but I’m confident I’ll make it – it’s really not an experience I want to miss.

For those that haven’t seen it, then it’s worth a watch, be sure to check it out on 846 (no, it’s not a porn channel) from 9pm onwards. I know tikay won’t be there, but I’m hoping Johnny Gould will be present as I recall many a fond student night being accompanied by Johnny and some crappy baseball. I wouldn’t mind if Helen Chamberlain was the host, to be honest, as I used to be a regular viewer of Soccer AM (pre-poker), so that could be fun too.

I’m no TV celebrity, so I fully expect to be shitting bricks come 9pm, especially with it being live and under the bright lights of the sky cameras, but I’m sure once I say a few lines of tosh I’ll be all right. I did a Poker 425 interview once in Luton, but that’s about it, so I’m still praying I don’t end up looking like a complete baboon. Still, to be honest, I don’t really care – what’s the worst that can happen?

If this opportunity had come a year or two back, then I think I’d be shitting through the eye of a needle all week (even without my current illness), but these days I feel I am a more confident person and am not as concerned with other peoples’ opinions as I used to be. Also, I’ve been going slightly mad recently thinking about life and death (sorry, that sounds intensely serious) and, for an atheist, that is always something that gets the heart pounding yet with a murmur of “Fuck it, let’s give it a crack!”

Either way, I’m going to give it a go and have as much fun as possible. Jen was the star of the show last week and she had a hoot, so I’m kinda looking forward to it now. Hopefully I’ll be a 100% come Saturday, even if I am a stone lighter from starving myself. I guess I’m one of the few to go on the box pleased with the “TV puts 10 pounds on” myth.