THE DECK AND THE FACE

Okay, well here it is, in all it's glory. Below is the recently acquired "Littlewoods Poker Scottish Football Cup" (catchy title, huh?) and I can now officially refer to myself as the "Hamilton Accies NLH Champion." Woooooo. Who needs bracelets?

Seriously though, it was honour to be presented this by colourful Scot Tony Chessa and my many thanks must go to all those involved in the organisation of the comp. It was a fun day out which even supplied my little tummy with a free Sunday dinner. Poker, food, and beer. What more can any sane human being want?

It may have only been a charity event with just 3 or 400 up for grabs (I'm not even sure what I took in the end), but it didn't matter. Suprisingly, everyone took it pretty seriously, myself included, and all from the the rookies to the pros were well up for taking the title. And I'm not surpised, look at the size of it! It'll take me hours to buff that every day. hehe

After the 'old school' comedian, who managed to insult almost every social group possible, had wrapped up his Bernard Manning-esque act, it was onto the main course. The poker. 6 tables in all I think, and a quick glance to my left saw the familiar (but hideous :-)) face of Mr Dempsey. Zoiks, could be some action on this table then, especially with Chessa sitting opposite. Either way, it was a going to be a laugh, and, although I'd said to Jen that after pissing around too much in the Bash Comp that I was going to try my utmost in this one, I couldn't help but become emersed in some of the wonderful banter that surrounded me.

High points were swanning over to Brian's table to wait for my £10 last longer prize as he moved all-in with his (wait for it...) rags. Similarly, Jen shoved her tenner down my hood soon after. No finesse some of these lasses (ducks).

Also, there were some amusing hands witenssed. One in particular saw Flushy, who now had a bounty on his AND Chessa's head, the former actually placed by the Scot himself, have Chessa and Mateyboy on the racks with top two pair versus a flush draw and a weaker two pair. Tony Chessa even called out for a spade, just so Flushy didn't win the hand, but, to his and everyone's amusement, a 5 on the river filled up Tony who made one of his miracle 2 outs. Boy, was Flushy not a happy chappy.

My game went pretty swimmingly from the start. The standard wasn't terrific, and it really was a case of wait for the nuts, or near nuts, and try to get them paid off. So, when I flopped bottom set, followed by the board pairing on the turn, I was soon up and running.

After moving tables to cohabit the equally loud space of Ironside (wow, can this guy talk), I soon found myself struggling. Not only becuase these guys were shoving my bluffs right back up me, but also because I was playing badly and throwing away too many chips.

With about 6k remaining, I shoved it all-in after seeing Iron's preflop raise find a limper. As expected, Iron 'raising mahcine' Side mucked, but unexpectadly, the limper called with A-J. I flipped over my K-T, and, although the first card out was an ace, I managed to pull the rabbit out of the hat with 2 pair by the river.

Right, time to stop messing around and play properly. No more stupid mistakes. From here on in, I played pretty well. A nice patient game that was rewarded when I found kings against Sheriff's A-9, and an ace high which held up against Bobby1's open ended straight draw with one card to come.

Now in full agression mode, the chips kept piling up, and then I suddenly found myself in chipleader zone when I stumbled across the following hand. I raised preflop with A-T of spades, Bobby1 called from the small blind, and Mateyboy called the big. Flop = 6-6-9. Both checked, I bet, Bobby raised. After a quick mull of the situation, I moved all-in, beliving that Bobby had a foldable hand. After umming and aahing for what felt like a century, Bobby called with pocket threes. The 9 on the turn was a killer for Mr Quayle, but I wasn't complaining. Should he have called? Borderline in my opinion. I was bluffing and still had plenty of outs, not to mention a backdoor flush draw. I was happy with my play, and it showed the table that I wasn't to be messed with, especially with 80k in front of me! :-)

By the time of the final table, I'd accumulated 95k and was chip leader by a country mile. In fact, I think Flushy was 2nd with less than half that figure.

The final was to be a fun-filled one. Firstly, no1, Flushy in particular, could keep a straight face when the cameras asked us to pose for half a minute. Iron even had tears rolling down his face. Lol. It's really not easy holding a smile for 30 secs, and you look really dumb if you stick on some serious poker face. What a dilemma eh?

What was even more amusing at the final table, was the way I uncharacteristically demolished it within an hour. Seriously, they were dropping like flies, and I couldn't miss. After Iron eliminted the first local with the dreaded aces v kings confrontation, I was seemingly invincible. And I don't mean that in a cocky way. It was more a case of 'deck, me, hit, face... very hard'.

A quick rundown of some of the eliminations:

8th: 8-3 v 9-9. two threes on the flop (Flushy shook everyone's hand and then punched me!!! Gotta be a first in poker.)

6th: 4-4 v 7-6 on a 7 high flop. Runner runner flush with one of my fours.

4th: Q-7 v A-K. I flopped a flush and, even though she had the bare ace, found no problems in holding up.

3rd: T-7 v A-K. Rivered a straight.

2nd: A-6 held up against K-J even though a scary Q-T hit the flop. Running twos were a welcome arrival.

And this isn't to mention the Q-7 v K-K that ended in a split pot with 5 diamonds on the board. My opponent wasn't too chuffed when I said, 'Well, I was unlucky to run into pocket kings.'

Now the above list may make me look a tad fishy, but I was a massive (and I mean massiiiiiive) chip leader in most of these pots, so it's not as bad as it looks. Also, I started the final table with a huge chip lead, losing any of these pots would still have left me top of the tree, which is one of the reasons why I attacked with such marginal hands.

Amusingly, when it came down to the final, the crowd of onlookers even started chanting my opponent's name, Eddy, who was at around a 290 - 25 chip disadvantage. Even I was spotted bellowing 'Eddy, Eddy, Eddy' at one point. I felt left out. :-(

Anyhow, with Eddy soon despatched of, I was left to raise my silverware aloft and bask in the glory. The crowd (well, one man and his dog) went wild.

A great weekend. A great comp. Great fun. Great something else. Great. Great. Great.

I look forward to defending my trophy next year, although I'm not too keen on trying to get the bloomin' thing back through customs.

Til next year Hamilton. Och aye the neu.