Friday, January 06, 2006


My online gambling seems to follow a specific trend that forms a 5 step process:

(1) Win comfortably for several consecutive days.
(2) Endure a seemingly unlucky session where I drop a chunk of money, but somehow manage to claw myself back up to even.
(3) Lose a large sum of money in one day playing bad poker.
(4) Without realising, continue playing bad poker thereby resulting in consecutive losing days and an increase in deficit.
(5) Spend the next week crying into my soup trying to work out where it all went wrong.
-- Return to Step 1.

Well, at least I’m returning to step 1, but, either way, this cycle occurs way too often for my liking. Even as recent as the end of last month, I dropped my hard earned dosh by failing to acknowledge the vicious circle I was tangled in. So, what to do?

The key is Step 2, the mysterious clawback. I can’t be the only one who experiences this turn of events. It’s really odd because it happens so frequently. Play consistently well for the whole week, then encounter a massive scare in one night. Is it complacency? Is it poor poker? Or is it simply bad luck? I’m not too sure, but when someone highlighted the occurrence last week, it suddenly struck me.

My view is that we become submerged in a feeling of complacency, and when that inevitable bad beat or vicious outdraw arrives, we find it difficult to handle. Several days of easy poker, for easy money, against easy opponents, then boom, the poker God excrete on you from a great height. It’s understandable that we can be rocked when things suddenly go against the grain.

At this point though, we’re still in a fit mental state to remain focused on retrieving that money, still playing good solid poker. Thus, the clawback, and when it is eventually completed, there is a real sense of relief.

Next day, we’re back on, confident that yesterday’s fright was just a blip. But again, things start to go pear shaped again. This time, however, the clawback doesn’t occur and the hole just gets deeper and deeper until we either motivate ourselves to quit or just lose our bankroll.

Well, I experienced the clawback yesterday, and I was well aware that it was happening. Therefore, to prevent Step 3 from occurring today, I’ve decided to stay off the poker. Perhaps after a clawback, we just aren’t in the right state of mind to start winning again. Maybe this is why it suddenly goes wrong. Either way, I’m determined not to play today. I’ll return at the beginning of next week and start the ball rolling again, fresh and revitalised. Hopefully, this way, I can avoid another car crash and jump from Step 2 straight back to Step 1. Fingers crossed anyway.


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